oh, to gouging eyes out

oh, to gouging eyes out

by Jan Delos Santos 

It is tiring to be this complex in nothing 

but thoughts and words and sound. 

It is too much choice and noise and heartache for my soul. 

And so, I have made the quiet decision 

to be the amalgamation of crocodiles and alligators. 

Where I’ll spend my time cycling between water and grassland only caring about how much heat 

I want to take. 

To be this kind of reptile 

is to be a rock that breathes 

it is to be a statue that no one dares to steal a kiss from 

it is to be death until food arrives, and to be death once again when they leave. 

I no longer crave skyscrapers 

nor the crimson of the news. 

I did not want the weight of cement upon shoulders. 

I do not want you to look at me like that. 

I will not crave attention if it means 

remembering the colour of your irises. 

As a crocodile I am expected to have fangs. 

As an alligator, you would not be surprised to find me cold to the touch. My tears are freshwater, darling. 

I will not sweat or shiver 

simply submerge me in ice 

and watch how slow I can get

watch me trickle down to a full stop the ticking you hear will cease 

there is no need to fear Me anymore.



Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.